NUT SAY WHAT??: Quick Takes, Vol. 2

Bits of nutty New York dialog… overheard by readers… and from various sources… thanks, eavesdroppers, for the gems you’ve submitted… all the unintentionally hilarious things New Yorkers have said to you, or stuff you’ve heard someone say to someone else… keep them coming… short and sweet… very welcome here at Nuts in NY.

NOT ENOUGH QUESTION MARKS FOR ME ANSWER SERIOUSLY?
Source: Bronx Women

WHO: momo
WHERE: The Bronx

I like the emo fashion? i like the hair and the clothes. im totally not emotional or sad and thinking about cutting my wrists. but i live in the bronx NY where its all hispanics and blacks (im arabic) and all about freshness and sex and no one knows what emo prolly is? is it strange to start dressing and looking emo?

TRUER WORDS WERE NEVER SPOKEN
Source: Above the Law

New York City raised the fine on people who refuse to pick up after their dog for the first time in 30 years. The fine now stands at $250. The fine should be $1,000 and your neighbors being allowed to poop in your shoes for a week.

UH, BECAUSE GOD INVENTED BEER?
Submitted by: DD

WHO: thirtysomething-looking guy talking to similar friend
WHERE: sitting sharing a big bottle of seltzer water

“Man, did they have this stuff when we were in college? Why didn’t we drink it then?”

WAKE UP AND SMELL THE CONSERVATIVE COFFEE
Source: Metro, also covered here.

WHO: Daniel Licari
WHERE: Bushwick via Miami

In Florida “you see those people from Middle America on their vacations: They’re not voting for Barack… In New York you’re surrounded by all these liberals, but New York is not like the rest of the country. The majority voted for Bush last time, and they haven’t disappeared.”

WELL NOT THIS CHICKEN, AT LEAST
Submitted by: DD

WHO: 4-year-old Leelee
WHERE: at the dinner table eating vegetarian chicken nuggets

“Daddy, do you know where chicken comes from? It comes from chickens! You run after the chickens and you have to catch them and then get the meat out.”

BUSH AND BIN LADEN ON THE GOLF COURSE
Source: The Dancing Image

WHO: construction worker talking to a buddy
WHERE: on the streets of New York

“They’re all in it together, ya know. You ever see that Michael Moore movie? On the morning of 9/11, Bush was playing golf with bin Laden!”

WOMAN SEEKING OMEN
Source: MissMoll

Call me crazy, but the most beautiful, amazing thing just happened. I have a cheap hair clip from H&M that’s perfect for my hair. Hair doesn’t fall out, doesn’t pinch head, etc. And it broke 2 days ago. So today, I pull out this purse that I seriously haven’t used in 2 years… I open it up, and find the exact same hair thing, but not broken.

It’s going to be a good night.

HER GOOD EAR NEVER HEARD OF THE NIGHT SHIFT?
Source: MissMoll

Someone’s alarm clock actually goes off every single night at midnight. One of my neighbors. I mean, why in god’s name would you set your alarm clock for midnight?? I can only conclude that it’s a psychological experiment to drive their neighbors crazy. Perhaps a bet on who’s going to violently knock on everyone’s apartment door first… Every day I am thankful for my “bad ear.” I highly value being able to sleep on my “good ear” to muffle everything even if the trade off is asking everyone to repeat what they’re saying and missing all the under the breath insults.

© 2008 NutsInNY.com

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The Gyronauts: Hoop is a Verb!

I met Tash — a.k.a. Natasha Kouri — the other day on Bedford Avenue in Williamsburg, where she was selling her creations: a wide assortment of hoops that she describes as “colorful, sparkly, shiny and gyrotastic”. Four-year-old Leelee was with me, and she had been wanting a new hula hoop since the one I bought her a few months ago got broken. Tash said no problem, she would specially make one for Leelee’s diminutive size.

Tash in hoop performance

I discovered that, in addition to making the beautiful hoops, Tash also does hoop performances that have been described as “majestic and formidable” — employing body paint and fire — and that her NYC based troupe, The Gyronauts, has had some great gigs. They’ve performed from Florence to Buenos Aires, and also at NYC’s Mermaid and Halloween parades, and as a part of performances at concerts with rock bands such as The Dresden Dolls… I sensed some hoopla, indeed, so I grew more curious.

The Gyronauts in performance

An online source describes a hula hoop fad that took place in the 50’s, although hooping has actually been around for several thousand years. And the difference now is that hoops are much larger than the hula hoops one might have encountered as a child. Also, hooping is said to be quite an inclusive activity: one needn’t be a gymnast or dancer because “the bigger and heavier the hoop, the slower it rotates around your body.” So, with one of the larger hoops, almost anyone can hoop, “regardless of age, size, or sense of rhythm.”

Tash was also involved with a troupe of hoop performers at this year’s Burning Man festival in the Black Rock Desert in Nevada. And, according to the New York Times, she was among 80 people working four hours a night, three nights a week, for three months preparing costumes and sets which they transported out west for their festival performance the week before Labor Day.

For more photos and information on Tash and the Gyronauts, visit their myspace page.

“Hula Hoop” by Rita Paul

Photo credits: Kerry McClain; Natasha Kouri
Sculpture: “Hula Hoop”, by Rita Paul

© 2008 NutsInNY.com

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